


sunrise and moonset

by blackhawkdown



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: F/M, Zutara Drabble Collection, but i don't want to clog the tags, various members of the gaang make appearances in these drabbles
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-11
Updated: 2019-09-11
Packaged: 2020-11-02 03:07:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,599
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20601266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blackhawkdown/pseuds/blackhawkdown
Summary: A collection of drabbles, originally posted to my tumblr in response to prompts. Each is self contained and won't necessarily have extra context, though some could ostensibly coexist. Check the notes for any given chapter to see the prompt that was given, as well as any additional information.





	1. can you save me (from myself)

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the dialogue prompt: 'Have you lost your damn mind?!' Not overtly romantic, but there are definite hints. Katara is protective.

“Have you lost your damn _mind_?!”

Zuko looked up with a start, golden eyes widening as he took in the livid waterbender standing at the entrance to his bedchamber. In his surprise, he knocked over the inkwell on his desk, the viscous liquid slowly spreading across the letter he’d been writing. For a moment, his eyes flicked back to the mess on his desk, dismay flashing across his features. “I was almost _done_,” he said, voice almost a whine.

An angry huff at his door caused him to look up again, and his brows drew together in confusion. She looked like an avenging spirit, almost, hands planted on her hips and backlit by the lamps set into the wall behind her. He didn’t need to see her eyes to picture the flash of fire in their blue depths, the way they tightened at the corners, that anger belied by the concerned crease between her brows.

What he didn’t understand was _why_.

“Katara, what- what are you _doing_ here?”

She moved into the room, crossing her arms over her chest as she approached where he still sat at his desk. “Oh!” she said, a tone of mock-surprise that made Zuko wince–she was looking at the ruined letter, and he was beginning to see where this was going. “So you _can_ write! I was beginning to think you’d forgotten how!”

“Katara-”

“But I’m confused. If that's so, why haven’t any of us heard from you in months?”

“You and Aang were busy-”

Katara’s voice overrode his. “Why is it that I had to hear from your _uncle_ that people have been trying to kill you?!”

And there it was. Zuko swallowed, hard. This was _exactly_ what he’d been hoping to avoid.

“I was handling it,” he said quietly.

“Handling it? _Handling it?!_” Katara practically quivered with the barely-suppressed urge to shake the Fire Lord in a _very_ undignified manner. “How is this _handling_ it? I waltzed right through the front door! No one so much as asked who I was!”

“Everyone knows you’re welcome here, Katara!” Zuko shot back, finally standing. “Besides,” he added, his voice softening as he looked down at her, the hint of a smile pulling at the corner of his mouth, “if you marched in here with _that_ look on your face, only a fool would’ve tried to stand in your way.”

Katara glared up at him, but soon it became clear she was fighting back an answering smile. Finally, she let out a sigh, and pulled Zuko into a hug. He stiffened for a moment before melting into it, burying his face in her hair as he wrapped his arms around her. “I’m sorry,” he said after a moment, though he didn’t loosen his grip. She didn’t seem eager to let him go, either. “I should’ve said something. I just didn’t want you… you guys to worry. You and Aang were doing important things, and I thought…”

He trailed off, and a moment later, Katara pulled back enough to look up into his face. “This isn’t about Aang. It’s about _you_. You know you don’t have to do any of this alone.” She paused for a moment. “Where’s your… where has Mai been, for all this?”

Zuko winced, and Katara read the guilt in his face as he finally dropped his arms and stepped away. “Her… her father tried to kill me. I didn’t take it well. And she chose him.” He shrugged, turning away so he didn’t have to see whatever look Katara wore–he wasn’t sure he could handle to see her righteous fury, even on his behalf. Or, worse, her pity.

But a moment later, he felt her hand on the side of his face, pulling him back to meet her eyes. “I hope you know that I’m not going anywhere, Zuko. Not while you’re dealing with this.” She gave him a crooked grin, letting her hands fall, but holding his gaze. “So you'd better make room. Because if any more assassins want to get to you, they’re gonna have to go through _me_.”


	2. hold me til the light goes out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Written for two dialogue prompts: 'We're in the middle of a thunderstorm, and you wanna stop and feel the rain?' and 'Tell me a secret.' Big ol' ball of romantic fluff.

“We’re in the middle of a thunder storm,” Zuko said slowly, his eyes moving from the cave-mouth to Katara, who stood just outside it. Rain was pouring down in buckets, but she hadn’t made any attempt to bend it away. The exhilarated smile on her face sent a pleasant spear of warmth shooting through him. “And you want to stop and ‘feel the rain’?”

Katara laughed, tilting her head back and looking up at the thick, angry clouds overhead. Lightning flashed, followed by a crack of thunder, and the rain seemed to come down harder. “It’s _warm_, Zuko!”

She spread her arms wide and spun in a circle, fat droplets of water suddenly suspended in the air and twirling around her as she moved. She looked… “Beautiful.”

Zuko didn’t realize he’d spoken out loud until she stopped and looked at him, tilting her head. “What?”

He swallowed hard, suddenly remembering to breathe. “I- isn’t that uncomfortable?”

The brilliant smile she turned on him was breathtaking. “Come on. It's _fun,_ I promise. You can go back to being the stuffy old Fire Lord tomorrow.”

Before he could give voice to his indignation (or try to force down the heat he felt crawling up his neck), Katara darted back into the cave and grabbed his hand, and he had to move quickly to keep from stumbling when she dragged him outside. She pulled him into a dizzying circle dance and started to laugh, and Zuko forgot, for a moment, that he was supposed to be the dignified leader of an entire nation.

He felt _free_.

Then he tripped, and with Katara’s firm grip on his hands, he brought her down as well–they fell in a tangle of limbs and laughter, and when they finally came to a stop, Katara was on top of him. Her hair fell in a curtain across his chest, and their noses were nearly touching. Her blue eyes glimmered in the low ambient light, crinkling at the sides like they did whenever she was feeling particularly mischievous. “I win,” she said softly, giving him an impish grin, before finally rolling off and laying on her back.

With an idle flick of her fingers, a dome of rain formed around them–a little late, Zuko thought, given how drenched they already were; but he realized a moment later that it had the effect of muting the sounds of the outside world. For a moment–for _this_ moment, at least, whatever else tomorrow might bring–they existed in a world of their own.

Katara was the first to break the silence. “Zuko?”

The Fire Lord rolled onto his side, facing her, with his head propped up on his hand. “Yeah?” he asked, his other hand idly plucking at the grass between them.

She turned her head enough to meet his eyes–there was something shy in the way she was smiling at him now, and he wasn’t sure he’d be able to define that expression even if he tried. “Tell me a secret.”

His hand stilled, a few stray blades of grass clutched in his fingers. His eyes searched her face–for what, he wasn’t quite sure. Answers, maybe. But he didn't even know the question. “What do you mean?”

Katara shrugged and turned onto her side, mirroring him. “Just… anything. Something I don’t already know.”

_I love you_. The words very nearly burst from him right then, but he bit his tongue to keep them in his own head where they belonged. If she noticed the wince that flashed across his face, she didn’t comment on it. Probably because she was waiting for him to speak. “You know everything already,” he finally said, fighting back the urge that still rose in him to tell her the _one_ thing he’d always been afraid to share.

Was that… disappointment he saw flashing across her face? “That can’t be true,” she prodded, a strangely insistent tone to her voice. “There must be _something _new. It’s been so long since we’ve gotten to spend time together.”

Zuko still couldn’t read whatever she was trying to tell him in the way her eyes bore into his. Despite the rain that had seeped into his clothes, he felt very hot beneath the collar of his robes. _Stop it, Zuko. She and Aang only broke up a few weeks ago. Don’t be stupid_. “I’m sorry,” he said, his tone careful and measured. “I know I’ve been busy, I should have- been there, for you.”

She shook her head, laughing softly. “Don’t apologize for needing to run your country, Zuko. It’s one of the things I love about you. Your dedication to being the leader your people need, even if you’re not the one all of them _want_.”

Everything after _love_ had faded away, that one word echoing his ears like a prayer–or a curse. He swallowed thickly. “I love your smile,” he blurted out.

Katara’s eyes widened–that shy smile was back. She bit her lip. “You do?”

“_Agni_, yes. I love the way it lights up your whole face. I love the way your eyes shine when you’re happy. The way your nose wrinkles when you’re trying hard not to laugh at a bad joke. I love the dimple that shows up when you’re about to start laughing so hard you cry. I love-”

He broke off suddenly. Once he’d started, it was so hard to _stop_, and Katara was looking at him with an expectant expression, and he was terrified. It felt like he’d crossed some line he hadn’t even realized was there, and he was inches from going so far he wouldn’t be able to take it back.

Zuko quickly pushed himself into a sitting position, his hands clenching into fists in the grass. He closed his eyes, unsure, and wary, of what else would come pouring out if he kept looking at her.

But when he felt a hand settle gently over one of his, he couldn't help it--his eyes opened, and he glanced in her direction. Katara was sitting up as well, and she was staring at him with an intensity that made him nervous. “What were you about to say?”

“I… Katara, I…” His throat bobbed as he swallowed thickly, but still the words wouldn’t come out. It was all he could do not to spontaneously combust from the sensation of her thumb rubbing comforting circles across the back of his hand.

“You can tell me.” She was whispering, but every word echoed in his ears with perfect clarity. He was pretty sure his cheeks were _glowing_ from the heat rising in them.

“I can’t.” The words came out strained, almost painful. “I don’t- I _can’t_ lose you. You’re my best friend, I-”

He broke off when Katara started laughing. He felt flushed, flustered, and was almost surprised that there wasn't any steam rising up from his face. “What’s so funny?!”

“Nothing, really,” Katara managed, in between fits of giggling. “It’s just… I didn’t believe Suki, when she told me. I thought there was no way that-”

“Wait.” Zuko's good eye narrowed. “When Suki told you _what_, exactly?”

“That you’re in love with me.”

Zuko wasn’t sure exactly what face he was making, but whatever it was had Katara dissolving into peals of laughter again. “I- I’m not- It’s just- !!!” he sputtered, trying to recover the scattered remains of his dignity, but then Katara surged forward, grabbing the back of his neck in with one hand, and all he could think about was the feeling of her mouth on his.

Oh. _Oh_.

When he needed to take a breath, he pulled back just enough to look in her eyes, their noses barely touching. “Katara, I- I had no idea that-”

“I know. And that’s partly my fault.” She was delightfully breathless herself, cheeks flushed, lips slightly swollen. “It took me long enough to figure out how I felt, and you’re… well. You’re you.”

“And what does that mean?” Zuko demanded, though his attempt at righteous indignation was somewhat hampered by the fact that he could still feel her warm breath playing across his mouth, and it was making him shiver.

“It means I’m in love with you, too, you big dummy.”

He kissed her again, sending up a prayer of thanks to Agni and whatever other spirits might have been listening_._

How he’d gotten this lucky, Zuko wasn’t quite sure. But damned if he wasn’t going to make the most of it.


	3. when is love not enough?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Written for the dialogue prompt: 'I can't watch you with someone else. It's tearing me apart.' Very angsty. Does not end happily. I cried writing it.

“What do you think?”

Zuko’s gaze shifted slowly–-he felt a little like he’d been frozen in molasses, every movement stiff and laborious–-from the Avatar’s wide, excited grey eyes, to the necklace he was holding in his hands. It was a betrothal necklace, he could tell that much at a glance. Fashioned from yellowed ivory, it looked as if the air symbol had been carved on one side. The other side probably held the symbol for water. The Fire Lord swallowed, hard, past the sudden lump in his throat. It was a moment before he trusted himself to speak.

“Aang…” he began softly, keeping his eyes locked on the necklace, if only so he didn’t have to meet his friend’s eyes right now, “…you know the Southern Water Tribe doesn’t do betrothals this way, right?”

From the corner of his eye, he saw a contemplative expression pass over Aang’s face. Then the Avatar shrugged, his bright smile returning. “Katara will know what it means!” He tucked the necklace back into his robes, and Zuko had no choice but to look back at his face. “She kept saying we were too young to think about ‘forever’, but it’s been three years, now!” he was saying, when Zuko finally managed to make out the words over the ringing in his ears. “Do you think she’ll say yes?”

“Say yes to what?” came a too-familiar voice. Zuko stiffened, afraid to turn around–-afraid she’d be able to read his stricken expression in an instant. She'd always been able to read him like a book.

At least, until it really _mattered_. Then it seemed like she couldn’t read him at all.

Or maybe he’d gotten too good at lying. To her, and to himself.

“Oh, nothing!” Aang said, cheery as ever. He moved past Zuko, who heard what sounded like a kiss. He did his best to school his expression into something approaching neutrality before finally turning around.

“Hey, Katara,” he offered, with a weak smile. There was something that flashed through her eyes, it almost seemed like contrition, but then it was gone, and Zuko was sure he’d imagined it. “I hope you’re well.” He winced inwardly at how stilted and formal he sounded, but he was worried that if he tried to force himself to seem _happy_, he would break completely.

That familiar crease of concern appeared between her brows, and Zuko mentally kicked himself. “Are you ok?” she asked, moving closer, though Aang still held her hand. The Avatar looked between them curiously, as if suddenly realizing he might have been missing something.

Zuko straightened his spine, willing himself to be calm and level and ignore, at least for now, the pain lancing through his chest.

(It was times like these when he would almost rather be facing his sister’s lightning again.)

“I’m fine. Don’t worry.” The words sounded hollow, even to him, but it was the best he could manage right now. “I’ll- I’ll catch up with you in a minute. I need… I need to get something.” _I need air_, he thought, but he didn’t want to say it and risk Aang becoming even more aware that something was wrong. It was bad enough that the look in Katara’s eyes had suddenly sharpened, and he was pretty sure she could see right through his hastily-constructed facade.

Before either of them could object, though, Zuko turned on his heel and sped down the hall, as quickly as he could without actually breaking into a run.

He didn’t stop until he got to his destination–-the one place he’d always been able to feel safe and calm, even in the years after his mother had disappeared. It was a small patch of carefully cultivated flowers, near the turtleduck pond. When Ursa had gone, it had stopped being tended to, but once Zuko had moved back into the palace, he’d made it a special project. There were even hedges, now, and a small stone bench inside, making it the best place for quiet contemplation on the palace grounds.

Except that, at the moment, he felt anything but calm.

Zuko sat on the bench, elbows on his knees as he cradled his face in his hands. _What am I doing? Why do I _feel_ like this?_ The questions ran in circles through his mind, but answers evaded him. The only thing he kept picturing was Aang presenting that necklace to Katara, and a look of joy on her face as she accepted.

It made him want to throw up. Nerves and some emotion he couldn’t name were cloying in the pit of his stomach, and for a moment he thought he really was about to be sick. But then-

“Zuko?”

His head snapped up, immediately focusing on the small entryway built into the hedge on the far side of the flower patch, where Katara stood, tension obvious in her posture. At this distance, though, the expression on her face was unreadable.

“What is it?” he asked, his voice slightly hoarse. He hadn’t been crying, but his breathing was ragged enough that he may as well have been.

“Are you ok?”

“Is _that_ what you came down here to ask me?” Zuko’s tone was sharper than he intended, the words harsher, and immediately he wanted to spring up and take them back, hug her and assure her he hadn’t meant it. Anything to bridge the painfully insurmountable distance between them. But he stayed where he was, biting back the thousand apologies that wanted to pour out of him.

He wasn’t sure he had the right.

“What’s going on with you, Zuko?”

He hated the way her voice wavered, the note of uncertainty, the fact that he’d put it there. Shaking his head, he stood, but only so he could _breathe_. “Nothing. I’m fine. You should go to Aan- to dinner,” he hastily corrected, though he couldn’t meet her eyes. The guilt must have been written all over his face, because Katara started walking towards him, arms crossed defensively over her chest–as if she could ward off all the things he wasn’t saying. Everything she must know he _wanted_ to tell her.

“We’ve been through too much together,” she said, and he realized with a start that she was finally standing right in front of him, close enough to touch. His hands clenched into fists, nails biting into his palms as he warded off the impulse. “I’m not gonna let you push me away.”

“I can’t watch you with him.” The words came out suddenly, and his voice broke with a sharp _crack_, like a shelf of ice finally splitting from a glacier. Katara’s eyes widened, with what looked like fear and something else Zuko couldn’t begin to explain. It was like she wanted to stop him, but couldn’t bring herself to do it. Like some selfish part of her needed to hear what he had to say.

Or maybe that was _his_ selfishness. His wishful thinking. “It’s tearing me apart.” It was only after he drew a shuddering breath that he realized the tears had started to fall.

Katara’s eyes were glistening, too. At first he thought it was the moonlight, but no–-there were fresh tracks down her cheeks. “Oh, Zuko,” she said, her face crumpling.

He couldn’t help it–-something deep inside him snapped. His restraint, maybe. His control, definitely. The last shred of decency he could cling to prevented him from making a grave mistake, but he still reached out and pulled her into his arms, tucking her face against his chest and stroking through her thick, dark hair with trembling fingers.

“I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry,” she mumbled into his robes. He realized she was clutching at him almost as desperately as he held her, and she was shivering, despite the warm night air.

“Don’t be.” His voice was oddly thick, but the tears had stopped, at least for now. He could be strong. For her, he could do anything.

“I… I made him a promise.” Her voice was still muffled by his robes, and Zuko got the feeling that she was just as afraid to see his face right now, as he was to look into hers. “I can’t- I can’t let him down, I- he _needs_ me and I-”

Zuko gently _shhhhh’_d her, stroking her hair with one hand, the other gently rubbing her back. “I know. I… understand.” He didn’t, but he could pretend. For her.

Anything for her.

“I should go,” she said, but she was still crying, and didn’t seem eager to move.

Zuko wasn’t sure how long they stood like that, catching one last, forbidden moment under the light of the full moon. When they finally pulled apart, he somehow managed a smile, and it held even as he watched Katara walk away.

But when she was finally out of sight, he fell to his knees and cried until he couldn’t anymore, with no one but the moon to look on in judgment.


End file.
